Knapp's Relationship Model

Viewing Friendship Through Knapp's Lense

Meet my roommate Jaaden:

Jaaden and I became friends in high school and after reflecting on our friendship I recognized how many stages of the Knapp's Relationship Model we endured.

Initiation: Jaaden and I actually met in middle school. She was a grade below me but we did all of the same sports and activities. We met as peers and were in a forced proximity which allowed us to introduce ourselves.

Experimentation: Jaaden and I shared friends but were not close ourselves. Hanging out in group settings with our mutual friends allowed us to learn more about each others' personalities and values.

Intensifying: My junior year of high school, Jaaden and I were put in the same hotel room for a week long basketball tournament. Here, we bonded through learning about each others' personal lives and practiced self disclosure. Through the span of the week, we became really acclimated to each others' company and our friendship became more personal rather than our previous acquaintance.

Integration: In this stage Jaaden and I began to do everything together. Double dates with our significant others, working out, and just going to fun places. We quickly became known as best friends by everyone who knew us. It was rare to see one person without the other.

Bonding: At this point in our friendship, Jaaden and I decided to be roommates in college. Jaaden graduated high school a year early and we both decided to commit to the Oregon State track and field team. We are currently bonded not only through out friendship, but through our commitment as roommates and the shared responsibility that comes with.

Jaaden and I are currently in the relational maintenance stage. I am hopeful we will never reach the deterioration half of the Knapp's Relationship Model, but preventing that does take effort- especially when living together. Online communicating helps a lot with our friendship. Being so busy, we often don't see each other as much as we used to. Online communicating through text or platforms such as Snapchat help us maintain communication through our day to day lives. Utilizing communication maintenance techniques helps us as well. We continue to practice self-disclosure, it is important for us to share personal matters that may be affecting our moods or attitudes. This helps us be more compassionate if tension occurs in the dorm. Overall, the Knapp's Relationship Model has accurately depicted my relationship with Jaaden and it was fun to break down the stages and truly see how far out friendship has come.